Suicide is Dead

"I would feel real trapped in this world if I didn't know that at any moment I could commit suicide" - Hunter S. Thompson

There isn't much originality left in suicide these days. The Vietnamese monks protesting the war by lighting themselves on fire and meditating, Romeo & Juliet and Elliot Smith have set the bar extremely high. Even Kurt Cobain, who used a gun (most cliche of ways) made it original by using a shotgun, such a long weapon requires much skill to use on oneself, or at least a great deal of heroine and creativity.

Choking on your own vomit, ODing on Drugs and/or Alcohol, shooting yourself, jumping off a bridge, using a noose, all of these methods will no longer get you a front page cover or any page at all except the obituaries. Where one will simply blend in with the idiotic driver who killed himself driving under the influence, or the victim who he ran over. The 45 year old father who had a heart attack and the grandfather who died of old age.

I still am amused with the accidental death by Erotic Asphyxiation (also known as asphyxiophilia, autoerotic asphyxia, hypoxyphilia, or breath control play) and I think that dying on the pot hasn't been classy since Elvis. Then again I have a weird asphyxiation with masturbation and time spent sitting on the toilet, I've never combined the two though. Just as I'd rarely waste my meditative time in the shower with an addictive masturbation.

SPOILER ALERT***
Two films that I've watched lately have had great fantasy suicides. Will Smith's suicide in a bathtub with the use of a Jellyfish, the only interesting part of the movie Seven Pounds. And then the above scene from Taxidermia, besides..anyone that can kill themselves and leave their bodies resembling a Greek Sculpture:



As for my own suicidal creativity, I was thinking of attaching an OFF Button to my body, that when pressed would release a high level of lead or mercury (I've always loved sushi). Or maybe someone can design me a venomous scorpion tail necklace with a protective casing made of breakable glass.

*Accidental deaths are left in the hands of a higher power and remove the morbid suicidal note. At that point in time no words are worth repeating, except maybe the last words of DJ AM posted on Twitter, again accidental deaths:

"New york, new york. Big city of dreams, but everything in new york aint always what it seems." 2:57 PM Aug 25th, 2009 via ubtertwitter.

For the concerned on my own health/well-being. I am HAPPY. Until you see that off button or a scorpion tail necklace, don't fret or fear for me. I am an artist, an entertainer. I enjoy the morbid, but art is what separates the Marilyn Mansons' from the Charles Mansons'. As long as one uses their creativity for good and doesn't give up on painting (A. Hitler) there will always be entertainment for the bored and the boring.

xo
Sean